It is over

months later... i am back here in so much pain... i tried to bring a small part of my heart to her something gentle something that asked for nothing but presence. she answered with distance, not cruelty just the kind of distance that quietly says “don’t come closer.” and maybe that hurts more than being pushed away. because i wasn’t trying to take anything. i just wanted to offer a moment. a memory. me. and she gave me logistics. dates. work hours. reasons. but not warmth. not softness. not the “i see you” i had hoped for. so i told her i’d stop. that i wouldn’t bother again. and she replied like it was two different things — me reaching, her refusing. maybe it was. maybe i’ve been pouring love into hands that never planned to stay open. and now i see it. she didn’t push me away. she just never moved closer. and i mistook stillness for safety. but today, i deactivate. not out of bitterness but because i need silence louder than her indifference. because if i keep reaching, i’ll forget how to hold myself. so here i am. no longer chasing the echo. just learning how to become my own warmth in the cold she left behind.